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The Student Loan Form Drinking Game

One sip every time they ask for your name
(Two if you manage to spell it wrong)
One sip every time they ask for your address
One sip every time they ask for today's date
One sip every time they ask for your date of birth

One sip every time they ask you for a piece of information that you've already given them ten seconds ago

One sip every time they ask you for a number that they allocated you in the first place and that you have to look up on bits of paper that they've just sent you, eg student support number, art id number, UCAS number etc etc etc

Two sips if they ask you for a number which they ought to have sent you but you can't find anywhere on the bits of paper they've sent you and so could just be a typo for another of the random numbers

One sip every time you feel like screaming I AM NOT A NUMBER

One sip every time they ask you a personal and completely irrelevent question eg 'Do you wear glasses?' (???)

One sip every time they say 'write in block capitals' and you fail to notice

One sip every time it doesn't tell you whether or not you actually need to fill in a question

One sip every time you can't work out what the question's about at all

At least two sips every time you have the slightly snobbish thought 'But I'm an Oxford English student and even I can't sodding work out what I'm supposed to be doing with this'

And finally, down your drink when you get to the typo that says that everyone in the UK, or at least certainly everyone in North London, is going to be repeating their first term three times next year.

This will ensure that you finish filling in your student loan form in a thoroughly cheerful and happy drunken state, as opposed to the complete and utter frustration which the form is supposed to create.

Date: 2004-04-28 07:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darwinian-man.livejournal.com
It's true! So true!

[hic]

[slowly falls over backwards]

Date: 2004-04-28 10:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] uberwald.livejournal.com
by an astonishing coincidence, I got the official confirmation that I'd paid all mine off today, so I think I'll get pissed too.

Date: 2004-04-28 02:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anotherusedpage.livejournal.com
hehehehe that's sooo cool. Congratulations. Now you are a proper grown-up

Date: 2004-04-28 10:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] uberwald.livejournal.com
can I be adult rather than grownup? Grownups are boring!

Date: 2004-04-28 01:49 pm (UTC)

Date: 2004-04-28 03:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fu-manchu12.livejournal.com
I love the way they've gone that extra mile to make things more inconvenient by making this year's form too heavy for basic postage, so you can't just stick on a stamp and send it.

Date: 2004-04-28 05:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anotherusedpage.livejournal.com
Mine didn't come with a reply envelope which really irritated me because actually now I have to actually BUY an envelope before I can send it. And thanks for pointing out about the extra postage, cos I might well not have noticed that.

Date: 2004-05-03 05:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lucy-lupin.livejournal.com
Oh dear. It reminds me of a drinking game one of my classmates once mae up about our "The Law an Journalism" (sounds as exciting as it is) lecturer. Two sips whenever Bruce Grundy says the wor "cute." Three sips whenever he tells a story about a colleague that ends up being a story about himself...

Date: 2004-05-03 07:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anotherusedpage.livejournal.com
hehe
On a similar note, do you remember who wrote the Arsenal Drinking Game and where to find it? I've been looking on my friend's pages for ages and not finding it, and I want to show it to my brother.

Date: 2004-05-03 09:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lucy-lupin.livejournal.com
Not sure if she's the one who wrote it, but [livejournal.com profile] zeft had it on one of her entries at one point. You could always drop her a line and ask her to link you to the post.

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